25 Days to a Happier Home — Say Good-bye to Jealousy

women who are jealous

Hi ladies! How is your home holding up through the hectic holiday season? I hope it is happier than ever!

Have you been obeying the law of kindness, following your leader, creating traditions, praying for your family and our other challenges? Having a happy home takes hard work and determination, but you can do it! You can transform your home into a happy abode for all who enter!

Are you ready for today’s challenge?

Today your challenge is to: Say Good-bye to Jealousy

“Me? Jealous? Never!” you may say. But consider these three common areas of jealousy before you mark off this pertinent challenge.

  • Your husband’s comfortable and easy lifestyle. Hypothetical situation. You are home with your three munchkins and two of them are sick. You have been tending to their runny noses and giving extra cuddles. You barely had time to throw some peanut butter and jelly sandwiches together for lunch. All four of you crash at nap-time. When nap-time ends, the kids are needing extra cuddles once again. Then you realize it’s almost 5:30 pm and you are still covered in baby goo and sporting your pj’s! Scrambling around, you grab some books for your kiddos and place them in the play pen for a few moments in hopes of grabbing a shower and throwing on some clean clothes before your hubby comes in the door.

    Too late. You hear footsteps and he is home. “Hey honey, how was your day?” Your husband’s voice booms in the other room.

    He sounds so fresh, calm and happy. You are still covered in baby goo, starving and plain wiped out. You come around the corner and he looks great in his dress shirt and tie. You spy the bag in his hand. “Oh, brought home some left-overs from lunch. The boss took us out to this amazing restaurant and I couldn’t eat another bite. He insisted I take the rest home.”

    A twinge of jealousy flows through your veins.

    “Why does he always get to go to the fancy restaurants?”
    “Why does he get to enjoy a hot shower in the morning without interruptions?”
    “Why does he get to enjoy quiet, alone time?”

    You see how there could be jealousy or envy in your heart? Your husband has done absolutely nothing wrong, but you are already on an angry, envious path that will create friction in your home.

  • The time your husband spends with family. Your husband seems excited to go visit his parents or siblings on a Saturday. He doesn’t invite you along because you are watching all the munchkins. Hours pass, and he is still visiting his family. You set a place at the table for him, but he lost track of time. Suddenly, you feel alone. you begin to think you are not a priority in his life. You married this man to spend time with him — not for him to spend time with his family!
  • Your husband’s interaction with other women. What about other women? Maybe your husband has to work around other women in the workplace and he comes home and talks about them. Do you immediately assume the worse scenario?

Jealousy and envy can come in many forms. But, in any form it can grow and wreck a marriage.

Right now, I can think of many families where the wife was jealous over her husband’s time with his family. Some of those women went so far as to encourage the husband to cut off his family. In fact, they began placing their husbands on guilt trips for seeking relationships outside of their marriage — even friends at church. The wives wanted their husbands all to themselves and were refusing to share them. Some husbands gave in to save their marriages, other husbands left their wife over this issue and moved on —leaving her and her jealousy behind.

How many times have you heard women complain about how their husbands do nothing around the house? Many women seem to think that the husband does nothing from 9-=5 at the workplace. When he comes home, they expect him to cook and clean after he has worked all day to provide for his family’s needs and wants. Those same women then begin to become critical of their husbands and cultivate a heart that is full of jealousy and envy at the husband’s “seemingly” laid-back life-style.

Little do many of those wives know, their husbands face business, financial and emotional stress that many of us could simply not handle.

I know many of you may work outside the home, and therefore are just as exhausted as your husband at the end of the day. However, many of you may be SAHMs like me who get the privilege of staying at home from 9-5 everyday. Yes, we work. Yes, we don’t clock out at 5 pm. But, we can take naps if we absolutely need to. It takes a little bit more planning, but it can be done. We can also take breaks from cleaning and teaching when we want and just lay on the floor and play with the kids. Rainy day outside? We can make up some hot cocoa and pile some pillows in the floor and watch our favorite movie with the kids.

When we stay at home we have the ability to map-out our own schedules, while most of our husbands have someone dictating theirs. They may feel sick, tired or just having a blah day, but they have to go on. Their work load doesn’t stop, nor does their boss give them a hot cocoa and movie break. Why your life at home with little ones is not an easy task, neither is his life outside the home. Don’t let other women’s negative opinions about their husbands influence your thoughts about yours. It will only serve to hurt your marriage, and therefore, harm your entire home.

Another sad, but true fact of reality is that many married men work around other women in the workplace. I will be honest. I don’t like that. I don’t like the idea of my husband chatting with another woman and working at the same place with her for 8 hours everyday. Not a happy thought. However, we are not at the workplace with our husbands. For us to begin imagining that he is sitting, laughing and conversing with another woman for hours on end is simply not fair. He could be just working hard to support you and his children, while you are fuming in jealousy at home with visions you have created in your head. Here is a verse that helps me when silly notions come into my mind:

“Charity thinketh no evil.”

Am I having charity and love for my husband if I am assuming the absolute worse is happening in his relationships with others? This is not to say you should not guard your marriage, but thinking and imagining things that simply are not true is not going to help your marriage at all. Instead, pray for your husband before he leaves for work, when he is at work and all the time! Pray that God will help him walk in the spirit, so he will not fulfill the lusts of the flesh. (Galatians 5:16)

So ladies, are you jealous or envious of your husband and the time he spends with his family? Are you jealous or envious about his work outside the home? Are you jealous of other women?

Say “good-bye” to jealousy. Take your fears and issues to God. Think the best of your husband. Be the loving and kind wife to welcome him at the door. Let him enjoy time with his family without being worried of offending you. Let him enjoy his restaurant meals and special trips associated with work without being hesitant to tell you about the fun time he had.

Jealousy begins in the heart and mind. Stop it there and see your home transform into a happier one!

Do you have any stories to tell about when God worked in your heart about jealousy? Did God give you victory in one of these areas and transformed your home into a happier one? We would love to hear about it!

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Don’t miss the other days of the 25 Day Challenge!

Day 1 Happier Home Challenge
Day 2 Happier Home Challenge
Day 3 Happier Home Challenge
Day 4 Happier Home Challenge
Day 5 Happier Home Challenge
Day 6 Happier Home Challenge
Day 7 Happier Home Challenge
Day 8 Happier Home Challenge
Day 9 Happier Home Challenge
Day 10 Happier Home Challenge
Day 11 Happier Home Challenge

About Alison

You can find Alison encouraging moms on Google+, Twitter, Facebook and Pinterest. Follow her there to keep up with all the latest momspiration!

Comments

  1. Luv your 25 days toa happier family, the ideas and thoughts are wonderful and I am planning to share them with my kids families. I am however having trouble maneuvering your site…I often have to click on a variety of old posts to find a link to the newest day…and I cannot find a list of all your old posts…am I missing something? Please guide me to making the mos of your wonderful blog…..wish I’d had your help when raising my four alone!!

    • Hi Bree!
      TO get to the homepage, you click on title “Pint-sized Treasures.” once you are on the homepage, you can scroll down and it will show all the posts in this series as well as some others. If you want to view old posts, go below the title “Pint-sized Treasures” and click on the different topics like marriage, parenting etc. It will take you to posts that fit in that category. You can also enter some words in the search box that is located on the right sidebar. It will show you posts that are related to that topic. Hope that helps!

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