I’m a sahm. Well, actually a wahm now, but I still stay at home with my kiddos. Since I have been blessed to me a mom, there is one part of the day that is super precious to me. It’s my child’s naptime. This is just about the only time my house is super quiet. It’s such a nice break from the busyness of life and I don’t want interruptions. So, most of the time, I do not answer my phone during naptime. Now, please don’t think I am rude. If you knock on my door, I will be glad you stopped by and make time to chat. But my normal, day-to-day routine is to ensure the house stays quiet during naptime. Let me explain why.
Stay-at-home moms do not clock out. I am not saying that stay at home moms work harder than other people, but they rarely get breaks. Sure, we can cuddle up with our kiddos or enjoy a park playdate, but just quiet, interrupted free time is scarce. It is pretty much only reserved for naptime and late nights.
I am not complaining, because I really, really, really love being a stay at home mom. I enjoy staying busy and having kids in my house the entire day. I seriously miss my babies if they go to the nursery during a church service. I just love this motherhood journey I am on!
That being said, I also enjoy naptime. It is a time for me to gain refreshment. In the past, naptime for me was only for resting or reading. Now, it is for working, resting or reading. Naptime is the perfect time for me to write uninterrupted and without stealing time from serving my family.
I need this time, so please don’t feel offended if I don’t answer my phone.
There was a time when I had three kids under the age of five. My kids needed me just about every waking hour, so there was little time for quiet. Naptime was a time I looked forward to, so I could just enjoy some quiet, down time.
However, people that worked jobs outside the home did not understand about that special time. Many times I would get phone calls during my child’s naptime because people just wanted to “chat.” Why did they want to chat? Because they were bored at work or had a lunch break. Most poeple think stay-at-home moms are free all the time. But, that is simply not the case.
So, I really want to help stay-at-home moms out and give a voice to their special, quiet, naptime needs. Moms, especially moms of young children, need a time during the day with uninterrupted quiet just to get them through the rest of the day. It’s tough to keep a calm and happy spirit if you haven’t had a few minutes or an hour of just plain quiet. Just like toddlers get grumpy without a nap, moms get grumpy if they don’t have a break during the day.
In fact, when I meet a frazzled mom with young children or a distraught mom emails me, one of the first questions I ask is, “Do your children nap at the same time?” If she is stressed and frustrated, most of the time the answer is no. One of the first things I encourage her to do is to get all of her kids on the same naptime schedule. That is the only way she an ensure that she will have some quiet time to regroup during the day.
Back during the days of answering machines, I would leave my answering machine on during nap, but turn off the ringing tone so the toddlers, babies and me would not be disturbed. However, there were times when people would call repetitively and then call my husband to see why I wasn’t answering the phone! On other days, before our scheduled naptime, I would be outside hanging my laundry and playing with the kids. When I came back into the house my phone would ring. “Hello?” I would cheerfully answer the phone. “Why haven’t you answered the phone?” came many demanding replies from several different people. This was not an oddity. I would be irritated, but would bite my tongue and reply with a, “I was playing with the kids outside.”
I still don’t get it why some people think stay-at-home moms are glued to their phones 24/7. We really do have plenty of work to keep us busy. Please respect that we need downtime too. You need to unwind at the end of the day, right? You get a lunch break every day, right? We don’t get a lunch break, but we still need to unwind.
Here’s a few things to consider before you text or call that sahm after lunch (which is the most popular time for a child’s afternoon nap.)
- Is it an emergency?
- Can I call her tonight?
- What time is her child’s nap?
Let your stay-at-home mom friend or family member have their small slot of quiet time. They need it to keep creating a happy home. Whether they are working, cleaning, resting, or reading — they need that time. And for you stay-at-home moms who are reading this — enjoy your quiet time today. You won’t be receiving call from me! :)