Being a full-time, stay-at-home mom is an amazing job. I love it!
But, there’s always a constant temptation.
To lose your joy in homemaking.
To forget your vision for a happy home.
To just give up.
It’s a temptation that’s real to all of us.
Soon those comfy jammies and hot cup of tea seem to call you to the couch…then to Facebook…around to Instagram…and finally tucks you in for a Netflix watching binge.
Then you hear your husband’s keys jingle at the door and you’re still in your jammies — with 3 weeks of hair growth on your legs and semi-greasy locks that are begging for a good scrub.
You didn’t plan it this way…it just happened.
But the painful reality is this..
No man likes coming home from work and seeing his wife in her sweats and baby goo on her over-sized t-shirt.
One reader’s husband was completely transparent when he told me he had legitimate concerns about his wife becoming a SAHM again.
“My wife use to be a stay-at-home. But, I got tired of coming home and seeing her without her hair fixed, no make-up wearing her pajamas. I like her working outside the home because she gets dressed and seems to have purpose in her life.”
Anyone can fall into that rut.
I don’t fault that woman.
However, I do want to help!
And if you’re in a stay-at-home mom rut, I want you to know that there are moms who care…and there are moms who don’t know how to get over the unhappy, not-so-zealous, less-than-optimistic, stay-at-home mom attitude. You’re not alone!
And yet, there are moms who have learned to be happy in an unhappy world.<3
Some of my friends who use to chat about their new recipes they’re making or their new decorating idea actually wilted under the seemingly monotonous life of a SAHM.
One of those mom friends invited me over for a few minutes and seemed as if she needed to let off some steam.
In an almost desperate whisper she asked “Do you feel trapped?”
I tried to hide my shock.
Truly, I was loving my life as a stay-at-home mom and wife. I felt like the queen of my royal abode and enjoyed managing my kingdom during the day.
I loved meeting my husband at the door and inviting him to sit at a dinner table that was spread with homemade comfort food that was made with loving hands.
Putting away my husband’s fresh, folded laundry and tucking line-dried sheets under our mattress created an anticipation for his daily return home from work. (Of course, this sanity saving laundry trick helped to avoid drowning in mountains of dirty laundry. If you have a big family, it’s a HUGE help!)
Spoiled is the only word I could think of when I meditated on the fact that I got to be with my children 24/7.
But my friend didn’t share that joy. Instead she felt “trapped.”
And it was extremely evident she wasn’t thriving in her home — she was only surviving.
No mom should become that overwhelmed.
She needed a friend to encourage her.
She needed someone to inspire her to thrive.
Many moons ago, I was blessed to be a part of a two separate ladies groups that invited inspirational women speakers to encourage us in our Christian walk.
Many times those ladies spoke about the home.
I enjoyed three consecutive years of gleaning wisdom and encouragement from these ladies.
Those ladies knew how to thrive in the role of a stay-at-home mom. They had raised their children and managed a home for decades — yet still woke up every morning with a passion to thrive again.
A passion to see a happier home for their family.
And their passion was contagious. It became my go-to when I would entertain the thought that working outside my home would be more rewarding…more stimulating.
I feel guilty if I don’t share their life-lessons with others!
And dear mom, I want to be honest.
If you and I can find purpose in our position as stay-at-home moms and wives and there will be little complaint from our families.
Our children and hunky husbands will be the main focus of our strengths and talents. And that’s a gift that no one else can give them.
Think of what you’re offering the most precious people in your life when you commit the best of yourself to them.
Let’s name a few…shall we?;0)
Benefits of a Family with Stay-at-home Mom
- clean and tidy home
- home-cooked meals
- kind, sweet wife
- clean and folded laundry
- undivided attention
- homeschool education available for children
- someone who’s available during the day for emergencies
- homemade goodies
- less-stressed evenings
Perhaps you’re thinking, “Not every stay-at-home mom/wife provides that for a family!”
But most of us are capable of giving those gifts to our families!
We just get distracted…and disheartened.
But, how can we thrive? How can we keep a fresh, upbeat spirit about our work as stay-at-home-moms?
We have to realize that stay-at-home moms are not “just moms” or “just a wives.” No, we’re are much more than that!
We are the heart of the home.
We provide the haven that everyone desires to come to for comfort and rest.
We have the power to create the atmosphere of our home with a positive attitude, hard-working spirit and unending kindness.
Have you ever heard the saying, “The hand that rocks the cradle rules the world” ?
Want to rule the world?;0)
Take small simple steps to give you daily inspiration so you can avoid the apathetic, uninspired rut many women fall into.
Disclosure: I know that being a stay-at-home OR work-at-home mom with a chronic illness is no joke. I personally struggle with fibromyalgia which can affect my physical abilities. However, I still try to keep thriving in the home a priority! If you struggle the area of health, take it one day at a time. <3
12 Surprisingly Simple Ways to Thrive as a Stay-at-Home Mom
- Wake up early. Get up before your family and spend a few minutes praying, exercising and getting your home on track. Getting a head start will fight the feeling of “never getting everything done.”
- Get dressed to your shoes!Any Fly-lady fans? I love her tips! One of her BEST tips for getting motivated to clean is to get dressed — all the way to your shoes! Completing this one simple task motivates inspires you to work faster, stay perky and handle each task with a more professional attitude. Yay for that!
- Wear an apron.Sometimes sporting one of these cuties will get you in the sweet spirit and busy-mom mind-set. Aprons seem to scream, “I need to clean or cook!” So throw on an apron and get to it! Psst! You can even make your daughter one out of an old pair of jeans! Find out how here!
- Make time for daily exercise. It’s tough if you have young kids in the house, but be creative! Here’s some super simple ideas on how to stay fit as a SAHM. You’ll love how you can fit those easy exercises in your busy mom routine! Daily exercise helps your body gain endurance and helps all those happy hormones kick in. You definitely need that after you stepped on a Lego or found a week-old sippy cup…..ewwww!
- Read inspiring articles and books. What you read affects your attitude and ideals. Fill your mind with positive books and articles about thriving your home. My 25 Day to a Happier Home helps stay-at-home moms challenge themselves with a daily challenge for the course of 25 days. (You can use coupon code THRIVE to get 30% off the store price!)By the end of the book, moms are more invigorated, refreshed and ready to tackle the stay-at-home mom life with a smile! I also recommend ANY books or articles from Club31Women, The Better Mom and Time-Warp Wife.
- Schedule a break.Have a scheduled time during the day to re-group and rejuvenate. I like to take my kid’s nap-time for this. If you struggle with getting your kids to routinely nap, read these expert nap time secrets! Once the kids are asleep, there’s a serene quietness that comes over our home. It’s a time our family guards carefully and I always try to spend 20 minutes just absorbing those moments. After that short break, I’m refreshed and ready to dive anatomy next stay-at-home mom responsibility!
- Surround yourself with people who share your vision. Try to spend time talking with others who have a passion to be present in the home. Others may drain your joy just by expressing their negative opinions about “Wasting your life” and “losing yourself” when you’re committed to creating a happy home for your family. We have a great group moms you can connect with at All Things Mommy on Facebook! I can chat with you there too! <3
- Get out once a week. I LOVE staying home. But, getting out once a week will help you appreciate your home even more. Take the kids to the library, park or just go out grocery shopping. Think about your munchkins too. They need to experience life outside the home as well.
- Don’t stay away from home. Right on the heels of the previous tip is one that is pertinent to becoming a thriving and efficient home-maker. Stay at home. Wow, that’s deep. Seriously, I cannot even begin to count the women I know that are rarely home. No wonder they don’t find inspiration in keeping their home and ministering to their family! The less you are home, the more the laundry, dust and bills add up. Yes, I mentioned bills. What do we do when we don’t stay at home? We eat-out, buy unnecessary items and waste fuel in our car. Staying home has so many benefits when you are a woman. Just try it!
- Play upbeat music. My daughters have followed my lead and play their favorite music when they’re cooking or cleaning together. Music motivates people ti exercise…and it also works for cooking and cleaning! Try it!
- Develop a new homemaking skill. My homemaking skills were non existent when I married my favorite guy 18 years ago. During the course of our marriage I investing in learning how to sew, cross-stitch, make homemade bread, homemade sausage, homemade laundry detergent and the list goes on. Learning new skills that would help create a more comfy and pretty nest for my family kept me motivated as a stay-at-home mom. Choose an interest and start developing that skill! You can learn almost anything from a YouTube video..ha!
- Stick to a routine or schedule. Our home runs much more smoothly when we stick to a routine. You can find an amazing stay-at-home schedule here that’s super simple to follow!
When I plan the routine for our family, (we like the word routine instead of schedule —because daily life is sometimes unpredictable!) I consider the normal, daily happenings like:
My morning routine before the children wake up.
Cleaning. (We do house swoops to keep our home tidy!)
Music practice time.
Evening house swoop.
Baths,devotions and bedtime.
When I had only two kids, I had a schedule. Now that I have six kids, I have a routine. Whichever works better for your family, stick with it. Setting a daily schedule or routine gives you purpose, motivation and security.
Remember in Proverbs 31 where it mentions the woman we all desire to be?
What does God say about her?
She looketh well to the ways of her household.
That’s what thriving is all-out.<3 Go thrive! You, your husband and your kids will see the improvement and love it — guaranteed!