Who is my ultimate hero in the realm of motherhood and marriage? It’s definitely the virtuous woman of Proverbs 31. I can glean so much from her character and godly traits. But, you know what? I can also learn from an enemy of all married women — the strange woman. In fact, I can learn a lot about intimacy in my marriage from Proverbs 7. Don’t believe me? Let’s take a look!
But first, I want to ask this question: why should I ponder on the ways of the strange woman?
It’s quite simple, actually. Her tempting powers are so alluring that men find it difficult to turn her away. I want to use those same tempting powers in my marriage. I want my husband to desire me and enjoy his wife. Remember this passage in the Bible?
“Let her be as the loving hind and pleasant roe; let her breasts satisfy thee at all times; and be thou ravished always with her love.” Proverbs 5:19.
I love the thought of my husband being ravished with my love. I love having passion in my marriage!
What about you? Do you want to be desired by your husband? Do you want thoughts of you to fill his mind throughout the day?
You know what saddens me? When I hear a married woman say with disgust in her voice, “Ugh! Nobody wants a man pawing after her all the time!”
Well, I disagree. Except for crazy sick days, I enjoy my husband “pawing” after me. You are truly missing out if you don’t enjoy showing physical affection with your spouse. And by the way, you both need frequent, intimate relations. You both need to feel desired, loved and needed. And you know what else? If you don’t find passionate intimacy in marriage, you will be tempted to find it elsewhere. (I Corinthians 7:5)
Dig down deep into your heart and asked yourself this question: do you want your husband to turn off the TV, phone or computer just to spend some time with you? Some of you may think it’s not possible, but it really is! It just takes a little more effort on your part, and trust me, it’s worth it!
Was the strange woman in Proverbs 7 able to distract a man so much that he had tunnel vision only for her? Yes, she sure did. But, just HOW did she do it?
Five Things I Learned About Intimacy From the Strange Woman
- She met him with seductive and provocative clothing. I bet she wasn’t wearing sweatpants or a stained t-shirt! You know what catches your husband’s attention — wear that! I know life is busy and chaotic at times, but grab a few moments before he comes home and greet him with an appearance he will hate to turn his eyes away from. If you want his affection, love and desire, you have to work for it. Shower, shave your legs, put on something racey, style your hair and enjoy dressing for your husband! You’ll enjoy looking beautiful too!
- She went after him. Most likely your husband doesn’t always want to chase after you for intimacy. You need to change things up a bit and go after him. Surprise him when your kids are sound asleep and make him feel desired, wanted and craved. He needs to know that you want him. Don’t let him forget it!
- She built up the man. No man is going to stick around a woman that pushes him down with her words. Stop criticizing your husband now and praise him often. Do you think he looks great in that new shirt? Tell him. Does he provide well for you? Thank him. Are his eyes absolutely gorgeous? Don’t let him forget it! Does his smile make you melt? Let him know. Don’t be worried that by praising him too much that he’ll become arrogant and proud. That is one of the silliest notions I have ever heard — But I HAVE heard it! The world outside your home is full of enough critics. Welcome your husband with praise, acceptance and admiration. He’ll want to come home and spend hours with you — frequently!
- She kissed him. It is super sad when I hear about married couples who no longer kiss — or only enjoy a pop kiss at best. Kiss your husband often, long, deliberately and passionately. You’ll get his attention for sure!
- She prepared a place for intimacy. The strange woman thinks of all the right details. In Proverbs 7, you see she met the man with seductive clothing, she praised him, she kissed him and she even planned ahead by preparing a room that had fine linens and smelled oh-so-enchanting. I know life gets busy, but make your bedroom an inviting place for your husband. Maybe you can’t afford expensive sheets, but you can place fresh, clean sheets on the bed, light a few candles, clear out the clutter and spruce up your bedroom. If you invest in any room in your home, I highly recommend investing in your bedroom. A soft and inviting bed, attractive decor and an delicious aroma will keep your husband spending more and more time with you in this special place.
See, we can even learn from the “bad women” of the Bible. Go ahead. Surprise your husband today and ravish him with your love!